This was not the Christmas break I had planned. I had looked forward to playing with my children, spending time with my husband and family, and even taking a family trip with my mother-in-law to Disney World. Instead, I found myself in a place I never expected.
On December 23rd, my husband, children, and I celebrated Christmas with my mother-in-law, Mimi. Our evening was filled with laughter and memories, a precious reminder of the pure love that binds us.
The next day, my mother-in-law unexpectedly went to the ER. She spent that afternoon in the trauma bay, and when the doctors could no longer regulate her breathing, they intubated her and placed her on a ventilator. Mimi was admitted to the ICU. For the next week, she remained in the ICU—sedated, with tubes emerging from her throat—while doctors grappled with a severe, unexplained lung disease.
I sat watching her stomach rise and fall as the ventilator hissed, pushing air into her lungs so she could keep breathing. Despite the bustling activity outside her room—with doctors and nurses moving quickly—it was quiet here, accentuated only by the steady beeping of machines.
In that still moment, I realized that all my thoughts were about me—what I wanted, what I was missing, my desire and need for control, and my expectations for everything. I was silently complaining about what our family was missing, about who wasn’t doing what, and about countless other frustrations.
Outwardly, I appeared strong; I did “all the things” and was the picture of a godly woman. But inside, I felt rotten, and God saw right through it. I was being selfish. I was trying to make this situation about me but this situation wasn’t about me at all.
Yet during that week as Mimi lay in the hospital, I experienced God’s work in unexpected ways. I felt His refining touch and saw His perfect plan—even when it wasn’t the plan I had envisioned. And while I always wish for my personal plan to prevail, I’m learning to trust in His.
During this time, I was so blessed to spend an intimate and full day with her alone. With her sedation lighter, I showed her pictures and videos, sang songs, and talked to her. Throughout that special day, Mimi offered me small moments of connection and understanding. I might say these moments were from her, but in truth, it was God who opened my eyes to see and cherish them.
With no improvement in her condition, my husband made the heart-wrenching decision to call in palliative care. We invited family and friends to visit. Her room was filled with people who loved and cared for her. And God softly reminded me that we’re never meant to face life alone—He has given us His church and community to lean on.
I observed my children as they gathered around the bedside of a beloved woman nearing her final moments on earth, wrestling with the profound and tender reality of life’s end. The sting of death is undeniable, a profound grief that entered our world after the arrival of sin (Romans 5:12). Yet even in that sorrowful moment of loss, I saw God’s compassion and love. I reassured my children that Mimi’s love for Jesus assures us that her pain will end when she enters the Kingdom of Heaven and we will see her again.
On December 30th, when the ventilator was removed, my husband and I stayed by her side. For one last hour and 45 minutes, she breathed on her own before taking her final breath. I remembered God gave Adam his very first breath (Genesis 2:7), just as the ventilator had given her air, and that our time here is only temporary (Hebrews 13:14 NLT). In His infinite grace, God transformed this painful journey, unveiling profound truths and offering me a fresh perspective.
Our beloved Mimi passed peacefully on the morning of December 30th, and we later celebrated her life on January 4th.
God was at work in this story—and He is at work in yours. Life is unpredictable and grief is messy and painful, but we can hold on to His promise:
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
